when i was younger i used to go to my nan and grandads on a sunday
after lunch an ice cream van would go around the square outside
they were sold by a man named badgy
last week 4 boys drove into the square in a car
they pulled out a gun on badgy and told him to get them the money and the cigarettes

moderntimes;

OK if you've made it this far then thank you for visiting my blog and i hope you enjoy what you read. there's sort of no point in my writing this thing unless people come and take a look, have a short read, and what i would love is to get some sort of feedback, positive or negative, all is welcome.

few things I'd like to discuss in the blog, some touchy areas as well. the first is the KKK.

i just watched a programme on natgeo conveniently titled 'Ku Klux Klan.' basically, i knew what i was in for, i knew the programme was going to get me angry, full of hatred, and was going to start this chain of thoughts of events that will fill my mind for the coming days, but meh, who cares lets just watch the damn thing. i want to say now loud and clear (as loud as i can get) if you are a racist, if you believe in any of the things that they're about, if you like who they are, if you are a ''skinhead'', or class yourself as a Nazi, then i don't want to know you, and as far as i am concerned you are a sick human being who should be locked away. forget democracy and a freedom of speech, you are a mindless confused idiot that has had a poor upbringing, a poor education, and now want to spread your filth onto good humble citizens. forget your rallies and your marches, you don't deserve any kind of stage where you can spread your hate. if there's one thing on this planet that i hate most it is your kind of people, you scumbag racists. we can bring this closer to home and take a look at the bnp. once again, uneducated idiots who don't even want to take into consideration that you might have actually descended from a non-white background. like that matters anyway. what is wrong with you people that think a white man/woman is superior. this is the year 2010 for Christ's sake, seriously you need to open your god damn eyes. sorry for my blasphemy by the way but I'm trying my hardest not to swear. the bnp believe that Britain should be for British people, they put on a front that all that they want to do is to shut the door to immigration, focus on the British people, and keep Britain what it is. but what is it? what was it? why are you so afraid of culture? they want a white country. which means every non-white then has to leave, or god forbid would be punished or enslaved. this is absolutely disgraceful and I'm sick of it. you can forget about democracy because these people are idiots. and i believe that i have the right to call them idiots.

i'll look back over that ^ in a few weeks probably and think 'oh i should have said this' or worded things differently, but that is how it is at this moment in time. i think i've made myself clear. i would also just like to say, if you are reading this, and you have me added on facebook or any other networking sites, and you believe in any 'racist' organisation, either message me to discuss your opinions (for which i would be grateful to have a discussion) or simply delete me from your friend list.

the second thing I'd like to discuss is slightly, only slightly, less heated. it's over this recent news of Jamie Bulger's killer Jon Venebles being sent back to jail, and the question of whether or not the breach of his terms of release should be made public. do the public have the right to know what Jon Venebles has done, and how long he is back in jail for. my answer is yes they do. i say this for a number of reasons. i think first of all Jamie's parents undoubtedly have the right to know. as far as i am concerned, i believe that these killers are sick people. i believed it then and i still believe it. to me it is not a question of whether or not they knew what they we're doing, of course they didn't fully understand, but they still knew that they we're taking a life, or causing a grievous amount of bodily harm. these boys should have been given life sentences and they should have never walked free. the fact that we pay to house them, then fund new identities is wrong. Jamie's parents should get what they want. the public are concerned. i personally want to know how long Venebles will be back in prison for, simply because i believe he is back where he belongs, and i hope he will remain there now for the rest of his life. it is said that his breach may have been the smallest of criminality's, but to me, that is not the question. he has broken the rules, however small, so in my eyes, he hasn't learnt, and he should go back to jail. another important point i would like to make is that if the courts where never planning on releasing details about Venebles' breach, then why say anything at all. by bringing this whole thing up again, it feels almost as bad as 1993. it will cause problems in jails because any new inmates that come into the prison could well be Venebles. the inmates will be aware of what has gone on and an innocent (but still criminal) person could be wrongly accused. god only knows what it has put Jamie's family through again, and it has caused this whole stir in the media and in the courts that will not be settled, probably until the details of his breach are released to the public. people are angry over this, and they will fight for the answers.

the last thing i would like to discuss is tonights Question Time. having just watched the show (in which the Bulger question came up) i would just like to voice my dis likening of Boris Johnson. i think the man waffles on and on about rubbish and i would like to congratulate him on turning me further and further away from the Tories. i am looking forward to the televised debates, i think they are a great idea, and as they said, a great opportunity for the Lib Dem's to be sat as they should be beside the Conservatives and the Labour party. it is a shame that the smaller parties, particularly the Green party, weren't given the opportunity. I'd also like to say that i am a fan of will self, but people don't half suck up to him at times.

thanks for reading, any comments/questions please feel free to ask. apologies if anyone has been offended by my views/opinions, but this is a blog after all.

for other reasons i would just like to state that my opinions of the outcome of the bulger trial are purely personal, and i do not wish to spread any kind of hate or negativity towards any of the families involved. it was a horrific tragedy that changed so many peoples life's. similar to columbine, the question of who is to blame crops up time and time again. the family cannot be blamed, and i have an open heart to every human on this planet. i wish for a similar respect.

manana;

Hola! Que tal?
Hello, how are you?
Muy Bien Gracias, y usted?
Very well thank you, and you?
Hasta Pronto!
See you soon!
Si, Hasta Manana!
Yes, see you tomorrow!

all in all;

You asked me so where have you been
Let me think now let me see
I stood once where Hitlers feet
had stood when he made his speech
In Nuremburg in thirty eight
When he tried to build the perfect race
He said black man ain't gonna run
Alongside our perfect sons
There was Dallas too, the library
The place they ended Kennedy
We stood where Oswald took his shot
In my opinion there's a bigger plot
Costners back and to the left
The picket fence the better bet
Paris came and summer went
The tunnel's now a flower bed
The famous turf that made Jeff Hurst
The vodka stops to quench my thirst
The Golden Gate stroke Alcatraz
And the fat man failed to get us passes
Jimmys corner in Raging Bull
De Niros jokes and bottled pills
Elvis tales from Mr Woodward
Any Richard Burton if you could
Tourists stare at tourist stops
One more picture one more God
Another top up for a change
It makes you think, it makes you sane
Talking more about yourself
There's a mirror too, have a check
Cheques are always passing through
Some depart but a lot come too
Restaurant talk or pick your teeth
You bite your tongue or chew your meat
Sleep or drink or drink to sleep
And one more week and we will meet
We'll talk of what we haven't done
Since we departed back a month
We argue why we have to shout
All in all it's nice to be out.

140;

Out on the road Dean and Ed Dunkel were playing basketball with Dodie's ball and a bucket nailed on a lamppost. I joined in. Then we turned to feats of athletic prowess. Dean completely amazed me. He had Ed and me hold a bar of iron up to our waists, and just standing there he popped right over it, holding his heels. 'Go ahead, raise it.' We kept raising it till it was chest-high. Still he jumped over it with ease. Then he tried the running broad jump and did at least twenty feet and more. Then I raced him down the road. I can do the hundred in 10:5. He passed me like the wind. As we ran I had a mad vision of Dean running through all of life just like that - his bony face out thrust to life, his arms pumping, his brow sweating, his legs twinkling like Groucho Marx, yelling, 'Yes! Yes, man, you sure can go!' But nobody could go as fast as he could, and that's the truth.

page 116;

When he was gone Dean pointed to the empty piano seat. 'God's empty chair,' he said. On the piano a horn sat; its golden shadow made a strange reflection along the desert caravan painted on the wall behind the drums. God was gone; it was the silence of his departure. It was a rainy night. It was the myth of the rainy night. Dean was popeyed with awe. This madness would lead nowhere. I didn't know what was happening to me, and I suddenly realized it was only the tea that we were smoking; Dean had bought some in New York. It made me think that everything was about to arrive - the moment when you know all and everything is decided forever.

chapters;

When people ask me how I’m feeling, I never really know what to say. I mean, I’m OK, if that’s what they mean. If it’s a casual ‘how are you?’ then that’s fine, but when it’s your sister or your GP you know they’re asking how your feeling ‘inside’ which I’ve never really understood, like there could be an inside and an outside, whatever. The point is it’s one of those passing questions, and it’s either just nod and smile, or get really deep and start to shout about how shit life really can be. I guess it just depends on when they ask you. I mean if I was hungry and they asked me I’d say ‘I feel pretty hungry.’ If I was tired I’d say I was tired. You get the point. Don’t get me wrong there are times when I do want to shout, but those moments are rare.
I’m on my way to my sisters today. She’s having a few friends over and she thought it would be good for me to come along and mingle. I’m not usually a fan of these type of things but if I refuse she gives me that ‘are you ok?’ look and I have to tell her yes I’m fine and I might as well be telling her no I’m not cause she’ll still carry on giving me the look. She’s only looking out for me, I know that, but this whole thing can get a bit much sometimes. The last one of these events I went to was 2 weeks ago. It was my nephew’s birthday, so I sort of had to go. I enjoyed myself though, so hopefully I’ll enjoy this one. I think my sisters trying to find me a woman. I’ve noticed there’s always a lot of single women at these places. So when I walk into the house and see just two guys in among around 10 women I’m not surprised. My sister greets me at the door and gives me a hug, then she takes my coat and tells me she’s really glad I could make it. I shrug and tell her it’s fine, I like these events.

‘Mark!’ shouts David, my sister’s husband, ‘Over here mate!’
David hands me a beer, non-alcoholic kind. Looks like another no alcohol party.
‘I was just telling Geoff about your little disaster the other night,’ David Giggles.
‘Ah do we have to talk about that?’ I moan.
‘Oh come on mate, it was funny stuff!’ David is still laughing.
I figure I can’t get out of it so I’ve got no choice but to tell the story. I don’t even know Geoff that well! I’ve only met the guy once. Yet I have to stand here and tell him how I ended up screaming my head off in the middle The Swan pub. I had this hole in my pocket, it’s not even a funny story I can’t believe David is telling someone about this. There was this hole and I had my money in my pocket and basically I didn’t know I had a hole so the money was escaping down it and as it went down my leg it felt like a spider, honestly, it was horrible. So it happened once and I was like ‘what the hell was that?’ so I start to slap my leg, trying to crush whatever’s inside it and then this other thing goes scurrying down the other side of my leg. So I thought there was like an army of spiders in my pants so I started slapping like crazy and by this point I was terrified, I’ve always had a fear of spiders ever since I was little so this was basically my worst nightmare. Anyways by chance, a coin then must have rolled into my shoe and I screamed my head off and kicked my shoe off. It basically flew across the room and by this point everyone in the whole pub was just looking at me. A coin fell out at the bottom of my pants and I put my hands in my pocket and realised what had happened. Everyone started laughing and I had to go collect my shoe and get the rest of my money out of my pants. I told you it wasn’t funny, even Geoff doesn’t find it that funny, he’s just smiling politely whilst David is literally soiling himself with laughter. David’s like that sometimes.
‘Ah classic!’ says David. ‘You don’t half crack me up sometimes Mark.’
‘I’m glad I make you laugh David,’ I say.
I feel a hand on my shoulder and I turn round to see my sister, she’s come to rescue me. She asks me if I’ve eaten and I say no so she takes me into the kitchen and points towards the buffet. The sausage rolls look good so I grab a few.
‘So how’s life?’ she asks.
‘It’s good Katie. I’ve had a good week y’know.’
‘Mark that’s brilliant!’ She seems really happy to hear that. ‘Listen there’s somebody I want you to meet. She’s from my work, she’s been looking forward to meeting you.’
‘Oh Katie,’ I moan ‘You know I hate it when you do this. I’ve told you I can find my own women, when I want, where I want, you don’t have to do this.’
‘Mark relax,’ she says as she touches my shoulder again. ‘She’s just really interested in meeting you, she’s not looking for marriage or anything. Come on, her names Rebecca.’

jack kerouac;

Part 1: When the sun came out red through the clouds of my last valley afternoon, Terry led me to Farmer Heffelfinger's barn. Farmer Heffelfinger had a prosperous farm up the road. We put crates together, she brought blankets from the house, and I was all set except for a great hairy tarantula that lurked at the pinpoint top of the barn roof. Terry said it wouldn't harm me if I didn't bother it. I lay on my back and stared at it.

Part 2: 'Oh, we fight all the time. He wants me to go to work tomorrow. He says he don't want me foolin around. Sallie, I want to go to New York with you.' 'But how?' 'I don't know, honey. I'll miss you. I love you.' 'But I have to leave.' 'Yes, yes. We lay down one more time, then you leave.' We went back to the barn; I made love to her under the tarantula. What was the tarantula doing? We slept awhile on the crates as the fire died. She went back at midnight; her father was drunk; I could hear him roaring; then there was silence as he fell asleep. The stars folded over the sleeping countryside.

17 more months;

approx. till I can pack up and get out of Winchester. I need to get away from this place big time. It's not that Winchester's a bad place. It's just I'm a little bored of the same. You only get one life, and this planet is there to be explored. Do it. Just finish the course first.

-

two years he walks the earth. no phone, no pets, no cigarettes.

ultimate freedom. an extremist. an aesthetic voyager whose home is the road.

escaped from atlanta. thou shalt not return, 'cause ''the west is the best.''

and now after two rambling years comes the final and greatest adventure.

the climatic battle to kill the false being within and victoriously conclude the spiritual pilgrimage.

ten days and nights of freight trains and hitchhiking bring him to the great white north.

no longer to be poisoned by civilization he flees, and walks alone, upon the land,

to become lost in the wild.

alexander supertramp, may 1992